When I found out that I was expecting Isaiah, I knew immediately that he was a little boy. I was certain. No doubt in my mind. One day, just before my ultrasound to confirm what I knew, someone said to me, “If they tell you that baby’s a girl, you’re going to be disappointed.” In truth, I wouldn’t have been disappointed. I would have asked them to look again, because I would have been shocked. Mostly, I would have been terrified.
I didn’t know how to raise a little girl. (I must have been crazy, because I didn’t know the first thing about raising a little boy either.) I couldn’t relate to very many girls I knew. I had had very few girl friends throughout my life. At that point, I didn’t know how to be a girl and be comfortable with it myself. Girls are complicated. They’re emotional and irrational. They cry. They grow into teenagers. There was no way I was cut out to be the mommy of a little girl. In fact, I had it all figured out. I wanted three children…. and they would all be boys. I was destined to be the mommy of a little boy.
And, I was right. I was destined to be the mommy of a little boy. The most beautiful little boy I have ever seen. A little ball of energy and excitement. A firefighter, a police man, a truck driver. He likes to wrestle and play sports. He held my heart from the first moment I saw his face. But….. he’s a child. So, he’s emotional and irrational. He cries. He will one day grow into a teenager; which terrifies me more than I ever thought it would. He’s exactly perfect for me.
I was also wrong. I fell in love with a man who came with an added bonus. A little girl for me to love. And while she has a mommy who loves her, she’s mine too. A little girl. And she is emotional and she’s irrational. She cries. She is quickly approaching those teenage years. But she adds something to my life I didn’t even know was missing. She adds a softness and a sparkle. We do our nails and our hair. She talks to me about clothes and likes to read the same books I used to read. There are Barbies in my house now and more craft kits than one person needs. Things I never thought I’d see in my space, but somehow they seem just right. We watch princess movies and play dress up. She has brightened our lives and our home. And she, this little girl I never thought I would have, is exactly perfect for me.
Some days, I’m still terrified I won’t get it right. But, I have learned, that just comes with the motherhood territory. Because the worries I have for her are no different from the ones I have for my son. The dreams I have for her are no different from the ones I have for him. They are my children. And loving them gives me so much joy. My sweet sweet boy that I just knew would fit into my life perfectly. And this spirited charming little girl, who brought a new type of love and laughter to us. My loves. My life.
Life As I Know It 
It is often said that motherhood is the hardest job on the planet. I don’t agree. I believe being the mother to a child that is not biologically your own is the hardest job on the planet. I had the opposite idea in my mind about becoming a mom. I was going to have 3 girls (Karen, Kristy, and Kelly). They were going to be the jewels in my crown. Then, as God often does, implemented His own plan and gave me one of each as a bonus with my husband when I married him. He also blessed me with a little boy of my own. So, here I was, the mother to 2 boys and 1 girl!!! In God’s humor (and wisdom), he saw fit to give me 2 little girls of my own to raise. The task in undaunting sometimes. You are right………….girls are emotional and cry. They turn into teenagers and drive you crazy sometimes……………..boys and girls do that!!!! But, with God’s guidance and direction from His word, whether it is a boy or girl being raised does not matter. The guidelines He has provided allows us to know how to do it. Rest assured, you are doing an amazing job as the mother of a boy AND a girl ❤
Thanks! ❤
Beautifully written Sara… and as I’ve ALWAYS told you, from the beginning of our motherhood journey, you are a terrific mommy. You are a GREAT mommy to that little girl, just as I knew you would be 🙂
Thank you so much! Love you!
Nowhere are we TAUGHT how to parent a child except through what we see around us. I teach college students and am constantly queried about raising children and relationships. Your take on relationships is the BEST I have ever come across. Thank you for posting them.
I’m just the opposite of you. I have two stepsons (who were 5 and 8 when we met), and my husband and I are expecting our first child next month and it’s a girl. Finally! Our house needs less testosterone.